All I have done for two weeks is cry
From Brenda – I jUST FOUND YOUR SITE IT IS CLOSE TO MIDNIGHT,ALL I HAVE DONE FOR 2 WEEKS IS CRY DAY AND NIGHT. I LOST MY HUSBAND,SOULMATE AND FRIEND ON OCT.17,2009 DAY AFTER MY BIRTHDAY AND TWO DAYS BEFORE
OUR ANIVERSARY 10 BEAUTIFUL YEARS.
HE WAS SLEEPING ALOT ALL OF A SUDDEN SO I TOOK HIM TO THE DOCTOR\ON A TUESDAY,THURSDAY WE WERE TOLD HE HAD WEEK TO TWO AT THE MOST.CANCER FROM BRAIN TO STOMACH,LIVER,LUNGS.
RICK ASK ME TO TAKE HIM HOME SO I DID. HIS KIDS CAME AT ONCE,AND CALLED ALL HIS OLD FRIENDS AND EVERYDAY FROM THEN UP TO THELAST DAY HE WAS COVERED WITH PEOPLE,UNTIL HE TOLD ME TO TELL THEM GO HOME HE WAS TIRED.
BY THEN HE WAS SO FAR GONE WE NEVER GOT TO TALK JUST OUR SELF,I HAD SO MUCH I WANTED TO TELL HIM.BUT HE COULD NOT TALK ANY MORE HIS EYES SET, AND HE JUST MADE CRYING SOUNDS.
I LAID DOWN BESIDE HIM AND RUB HIS HEAD,AND HELD HIS HAND TOLD HIM I LOVED HIM AND HE WOULD BE IN MY HEART FOR EVER,AND TO THANK OF THE BLUE OCEANS AND BEAUTIFUL BEACHES WE HAD SEEN OVER THE YEARS.JUST KEEP THANKING OF THEM AND SEEING OCEAN AND US ON BEACH.I TALKED TO HIM ALNIGHT UNTIL I FEEL ASLEEP AROUND 3-4 IN THE MORNING,WHEN I WOKE HE WAS GONE.MY LOVE AND MY LIFE. AND MY HEART.
I CAN NOT SEEM TO DO ANYTHING BUT THINK OF RICK EVEN AT WORK. I TRY TO STAY BUSY AND AWAY FROM HOME AS MUCH AS I CAN BUT WHEN I DO COME HOME I AM ALONE MY LOVE IS GONE.IDO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO
AND CAN NOT ASK FRIENDS TO STAY WITH ME, THEY HAVE FAMILIES AND THAT ONLY HELPS A LITTLE I STILL CRY.
I JUST WANT MY HUSBAND!
brenda
i too suddenly lost my husband on sept 16 09 and i do not know if this will help you but about going home try to remember that this is the home you shared in love and there is a comfort in that,i am sure there are healing memories there for you. it will not take the pain and loneliness away fo him but it does help and he is close to you there in the space you shared. take the time you need and then take some more
i too just want menno back but that is not going to happen so in this physical space he is sacred in our homeas he is in my heart and soul
laurel