I lost my mother and my husband in 6 days

From Lynda -

I lost my mother June 12th from lung cancer and I thought it was bad until 6 days later I got a call from Continental telling me my husband had died on the way from Brussels to Newark. They had to tell me over the phone because I live 100 miles from Houston and it was breaking on the news. It was just luck that I was talking to our daughter and hadn’t put the TV on yet. He was coming home to go with me to take my Mom’s ashes to West Virginia. I understand my Mom’s death but my husband was the best person I have ever known. He died doing what he loved, but he left me behind and I don’t know how to be without him. We have 6 grown children who are wonderful kids and have taken care of me every step of the way, but he was what made me want to get up every day. I don’t seem to be able to handle anything. The hundreds of cards I have opened have all said he always had a smile on his face. I know how much he loved me and I know he knew I loved him but the pain is so unbearable. I wake up before dawn and for just a brief instant eveything is ok and then I remember. I actually had a friend ask if I’d packed his clothes up yet. I can’t even unpack his suitcase or look at his flight bag yet. I opened it to take out the chocolate he said he was bring me from Brussels and I can’t stand to see it. I know how lucky I was to have 37 yrs with him but it doesn’t help. I just don’t know where to start or if I will ever even want to. I take every thing minute by minute now because it’s all I can do. When does it get better? I have always been a strong person. I had to be to be married to a pilot. You learn to handle sick kids, tornadoes, hurricanes, and everything else but I feel so helpless now and angry at myself for being this way.

From Each day gets harder,